


The Final Veil

by EarendilEldar



Series: Return to the Blessed Realm [4]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Acceptance, Angst and Romance, BDSM, Disregards Laws and Customs Among the Eldar, Dom/sub Undertones, Insecurity, Kink Exploration, M/M, Referenced BDSM, kinky elves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:01:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25286503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EarendilEldar/pseuds/EarendilEldar
Summary: Maedhros is finally ready to give in to FIngon's pleas to dispense with the Laws and Customs regarding premarital sex and make their fëar one, at long last.  But there's one thing Maedhros is still worried about and needs Fingon to know about him before they can proceed.  He wants to reassure Fingon that he will not let this secret of his overtake him, but maybe Maedhros underestimates Fingon's curiosity and adaptability....
Relationships: Fingon | Findekáno/Maedhros | Maitimo
Series: Return to the Blessed Realm [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1741945
Comments: 2
Kudos: 36





	The Final Veil

**Author's Note:**

> So, yeah, Maedhros kind of insisted that it be made clear that "The Only Option" is not in this 'verse and that *here* he is a Total (and frequently Dom) Top....

_“Come,” he said, rising and holding out his hand to Maedhros. “We have much to talk of, Maitimo,” Fingon said, wrapping his arm around Maedhros’s waist as they walked up the stairs together._

Fingon lead Maedhros up the stairs and to his apartment in the southern side of the house. He closed the door behind them and turned to Maedhros who was still looking rather mesmerized. Fingon smiled and reached up to stroke Maedhros’s cheek and brush his fingertips along his neck before twining his fingers through Maedhros’s soft hair. 

“Kiss me, Timo?” Fingon murmured.

Maedhros started to lean in, then he paused. “I think you may be right that we have much to talk of, Kano…. And I think we should talk before we act.”

Fingon held back a disappointed sigh. “You always were rather more prudent than I in these matters,” Fingon said affectionately. 

“Not very romantic, you mean,” Maedhros apologized. 

“It’s alright. I know you’re not wrong, we should talk. I, for one, don’t exactly have experience from which to lead us forward, even if I’ve heard rather a lot.”

“I haven’t the sort of experience you speak of, either,” Maedhros said, “though living in camps for many years, one cannot but acquire knowledge of some things….”

“Yes. And having brothers helps as well. We may be inexperienced, but we shall find our way, together, as long as we can lead one another. I know oil is required, of course, and that shall be no trouble. And we must take the time to prepare properly.”

Maedhros nodded but still seemed discomfited.

“Is that what concerns you?” Fingon asked, reaching for Maedhros’s hand. “Because if it is, I should tell you that I’ve always thought I should prefer for you to take me. I want that, and I’m ready for it.”

Maedhros swallowed hard and held Fingon’s hand a little tighter. “I want that, too, Kano. More than I can tell you.” Then he sighed. “There’s something I need to speak of, though, because I know that sometimes in the midst of ecstasy one is wont to say things or do things… and I don’t want to frighten you, in case I say something… I want you to know that I would never hurt you, Kano.”

Fingon looked at Maedhros for a long moment, trying to decipher what he was worried about. “Let us sit, Timo,” he suggested, leading Maedhros to the settee in his sitting room. “Timo, we’ve been through a lot, both together and apart, and that’s really rather a gross understatement. I think such _careful_ talk doesn’t truly befit us. Tell me plainly of what you speak, my love?”

Maedhros’s head dropped a bit as he glanced away. “I do not wish for you to recoil from me,” he murmured, “especially now. But I need you to know about it. You speak of wishing for me to take you, and so I expect that, like me, your thoughts and dreams may not always have been of the pure and continent sort our forebears were sure we could only have for one another.”

“I should say not!” Fingon said with a smile. “But as I have also said, those old ways were always impossible, especially for those like us.”

Maedhros was quiet for a long while then. “Kano, I think the old Laws and Customs might never have imagined some of the things that have gnawed at my mind at times. I have at times been so consumed of a thought of you that I scarcely knew my own name, any of them, and some of my thoughts have been so far from pure that I fear them as greatly as I desire them. I don’t know if these things are another sort of scar left on me from Angband or if I am but an aberration. I do know I never had or recognized such thoughts before my time there, but when I think now on such things, even after the peace and healing I found in Lorien… I still find such thoughts desirable….”

Fingon just took Maedhros’s hand in his again and said, “What thoughts, Timo?”

Maedhros let out a long breath. “I remember one occasion, for some reason we had prisoners in the camp. I don’t know why. Ordinarily we just fought for whatever we had to and got out as quickly as possible, but this time we had captives. And on one night I had been walking through the camp and I looked upon one who was restrained, bound by the wrists. And my thoughts, Kano… I couldn’t help them – all I could think of for several minutes was… taking you, like that, bound at the wrists. Not against your will – never that – but… I don’t know… as if it were a game between us, as if you played at resisting me, or more at submitting your will to mine.” Maedhros fell silent, then said very quietly, “You see what I mean when I say I am an aberration.”

Fingon did not respond for a long while. 

“I’m sorry, Kano,” Maedhros whispered. “You have my word that I shall master these feelings and I would _never_ -”

“Timo…,” Fingon said, stopping him with a hand upon his arm. “Grasp my wrist,” he said, holding out his other hand.

“What do you mean?” Maedhros asked, his brow furrowed.

“Just as I say, Maitimo. Go on. Grasp my wrist,” Fingon nodded.

Maedhros looked at him for a moment, then took hold of Fingon’s outstretched wrist.

Fingon rolled his eyes slightly and cocked his head. “You are stronger than that. Go on. With the desire you speak of….”

Now Maedhros stared wide-eyed at Fingon. “Are you certain you -”

“Yes. I want to know your desires, Matimo.”

Maedhros hesitated for a moment, but then tightened his grasp as much as he dared. As he did, Fingon’s gaze grew somewhat glassy and his breath quickened. Maedhros quickly let go again. 

“You see? It is some evil, some stain upon me….”

“I disagree,” Fingon said. “Maitimo, I felt an excitement I’ve never known or contemplated before when you did that. I should like to feel it more fully….”

“I don’t want this to taint you, too, Kano,” Maedhros said desperately.

“Maitimo,” Fingon said seriously, clasping Maedhros’s arm, “when I say I want to bind my fëa to yours, I mean _all_ of it. I know you love me and you would never harm me, and that’s why I trust you now, in finding our own way together in our own time.”

“You don’t think it evil?” Maedhros asked, still somewhat hesitant despite the certainty of Fingon’s candor.

Fingon shook his head. “There is not evil in you. There was evil done to you and you bore the burden of the evil of others, but _you_ are not evil. You are fire and passion and strength, and I have always been drawn to that in you. And now I want to know that passion, intimately and fully and eternally, with you. Let me prove this to you, that we may at last vanquish this final barrier of shadow that stands between us. Then you will have no question of my heart and mind in these matters, no matter how unique to us they may be.”

Maedhros was quiet for a long moment, holding Fingon’s hand in his. “I never thought you could accept such a thing in me,” he said softly, “let alone that you might embrace it and meet my desires.”

Fingon just smiled and pulled Maedhros closer for a kiss. “I think we have much to learn and explore together, Timo. And I am eager to start as we mean to go on.”

With Fingon’s kiss of acceptance, Maedhros could feel the fog of doubt beginning to evaporate. “As am I, my beloved Findekáno,” Maedhros said, squeezing Fingon’s hand, now eagerly ready to burn away with the fire of passion the last delicate veil that stood between them and make their fëar everlastingly one.


End file.
